More tangerines, please

It's the evening before my first weigh-in. I was worried I would pig out today when I went to my parents' place for dinner, but I think I did well. We'll see. All I want is a tiny 2lb loss. Please.

The day started out with the usual low fat cottage cheese with chives on sesame Ryvitas, with an apple (cored because I LOVE cored apples. I've always hated gnawing on apple cores. Ain't nobody got time for that!)

Then at around 4pm, we had dinner. Dad made pot-roasted brisket in beer with parsnips and mushrooms. And it was delicious. Really good. I had to hold myself back from putting too much on my plate, and I think I succeeded. I should mention that the plate is enormous (as most plates are at my parents' house), but still - check out all that empty space!

Most of what I put on my plate was beef, carrots, cauliflower (okay, not much of that) and parsnips. I had a couple of mini Yorkshire puddings and a few tiny potatoes. Then, I dished myself up a really small bowl of apple crumble with a tiny amount of ice cream. After all that, I felt reasonably full, but I wasn't dying like I usually would be. Woohoo!

Starting to get nervous about tomorrow's weigh-in. I just need to stop attaching so much importance to the outcome. If it's a bad result, I guess I could easily just do what I would normally do, and tell myself, "Well, that didn't work. You've had a hard week. Here's a massive bag of tangy cheese Doritos for your efforts." But I'm determined to break away from that sort of behaviour. If I don't get the result I'm hoping for tomorrow, I'll just have to stay calm and remind myself of all the things that went wrong this week, and try harder this week.

Anyway, I did have a non-scale victory of sorts today. M hugged me today and said he thought I felt smaller. Trust me, that's not the sort of thing he says often! Given that I'm at my highest ever weight, it was hard to take him seriously. But you know how one grapefruit of fat is the same as one tangerine of muscle? Maybe I'm finally turning grapefruits into tangerines! I have been doing kettlebell workouts for over three weeks, after all. So I'm pretty pleased about that comment, I have to say. And he said my arms were definitely different. YES. Progress. These are the sort of things I'll need to remember tomorrow if my weigh-in is a disaster...